Yesterday’s Rally In The Valley was a blazing success!
The clouds parted and the Horrors (and friends) braved the searing temperatures for a spectacular scrimmage in the sun!

(Photos by Clark Thompson…)

Check out our Facebook page for more action photos and live video from this event!

Many thanks to all the wonderful fans, skaters, Frightmares, refs, NSOs, and other volunteers who made this such a great event!

(Photo by Clark Thompson…)

Special thanks to…
Darkside Records for providing the rockin’ derby atmosphere, and to our announcers, the legendary Bobby Narco and our own Alovicious Snuffleupagus!

And to our intrepid photographers Clark Thompson and Greg Paret!

Wondering how you can get in on the action?
Curious about playing roller derby?
Come to our next Boot Camp on Tuesday, September 11th!

Hudson Valley Horrors Boot Camps are the perfect way to get a “crash course” in everything you need to know about roller derby (including how to roller skate).
Absolutely no experience necessary! We’ll teach you everything from the ground up!
So what are you waiting for? Get in on this exciting sport!

This September 18th and 20th we are holding open enrollment for new skaters!
No experience necessary, we’ll teach you everything you need to know (including how to skate)!

Come down to Hyde Park Roller Magic Tuesday, September 18th from 6:30 PM to 9 PM, or Thursday, September 20th from 7 PM to 10 PM and join our family of do gooders, bruise makes, no fakers, and real skaters!
Enrollment for adults (women 18+) and juniors (boys and girls under 18) will be on the 18th.  
Enrollment for adult women from 18-118 on the 20th.

Roller derby is a team sport in every sense of the word. 
It’s an environment that fosters camaraderie and bonding among women.
We truly are a family, and we do so much more than just skate!
We are active in our community and support numerous charities.
We also have a junior league that builds confidence, character, and teamwork skills for young people.
Being a Horror is one of the best experiences you can have.

Guys, did you know you can get involved too?
While skating in the WFTDA is only for woman-identified folks, men can be referees!
Come train with us and learn this vitally important and desperately needed skill!

The Hudson Valley Horrors are on a roll! Be a part of it!

A big THANK YOU to the students of Duchess Community College for this cool video of the last Horrors home bout!

Want to see the Horrors live and in your face? Come to one of our next home bouts!

July 28th – Rally In The Valley!

October 14th – Horrors Vs. CNY!

November 11 – Draculadies Vs Apocalips!

We honor this Horror with a poem…

He calms us down,
When we’re going for blood.
Our ref supreme has an eye for truth,
If we bust someone’s jaw or knock out a tooth.
He calls ’em like he sees ’em.
We wouldn’t want to be him,
When the fans all scream and yell,
He tells them go to Hell.
As for us, we don’t abuse you,
‘cus we never want to lose you.
You make us play our best,
Thank you Scud, Head Ref.

This month Pin-Up Ghoul, a skater who suffered an injury and decided to remain fully active with the league, has become a tremendously valuable league member for the Hudson Valley Horrors.

Pin-Up Ghoul’s time commitment to the team is incredible. She manages the Merch committee, manages the league teams, coaches and is a member of the leagues Board of Directors.

All this and a full time job and taking care of herself with physical therapy, makes her a team player on and off the track.

Thank you Pin-Up Ghoul!

Find her at our next bout and say HI! September 20th at Hyde Park Roller Magic, doors open at 6pm, whistle at 7pm.

We gathered our newest crop of Fresh Meat to ask them one simple question… Why did you join roller derby? Here are their responses.

“Cause I wanted to. I needed something different in my life.”
– Julia McNacamee

“I thought it was really kick ass that there was a roller derby team here and I always wanted to try it.” 
-Erica Wood

“I always really loved skating. It seemed to be an athletic sport I could participate in and be good at.”
– Shannon Milczewski

“It’s extreme, I’ve never really done anything like this before.”
– Brenna Anderson

“I have a high stress job, just moved to the area and wanted to make friends. I came to open skate and saw Cherry Lifesaver, she gave me a flier, and was hooked ever since.”
– Domi Waldron

“Wanted to be part of a team, make friends, and it is bad ass.”
-lulia Ionescu

Why did you join junior roller derby?

My sisters both play on the adult league and they really liked it so i decided to try it out. I came to a practice and loved it.

How did you choose your derby name and number?

I thought of my name, Khloe Karsmashian, because I really like Khloe Kardashian. So I switched out “dash” with “smash”. My number, 16, was my volleyball number when I played in middle school.

What is your favorite thing about roller derby?

Honestly, I love everything about roller derby but if i had to choose one thing it would be hitting. I really like being able to hit people and not get in trouble for it and get some aggression out.

What is your favorite position to play?

My favorite position is jamming because I love the feeling that I get when i get through the pack as lead and everyone’s cheering.

What’s one derby moment you will never forget?

At my last game I played i was jamming when  the girl in front of me fell and i tumbled over her. I did three somersaults, popped up, continued skating, and got through the pack, getting lead jammer.

Any pre-game rituals?

No, not really. I just keep thinking to myself that my team is going to win, we’re the best, and I will do my best as captain! Just positive thoughts.

What do you feel you and your team could work on?

I think my team and I need a little more work on being louder when communicating in the pack and having better jammer awareness.

What do you think you and your team have progressed in?

I think my team and I have gotten more comfortable around each other and working better as a team.

What are your goals for next season?

1-To get more girls and recruit more!
2-Become a better skater, blocker, and jammer.
3-To work on communication and jammer awareness.

How do you plan on staying fit during the off season?

I plan on staying fit by taking gym class in school, going to open skate at the roller rink, and PLANK, PLANK, PLANK!!!!

On December 14th, 2013, the Orange County Choppers paid us a visit. Watch the Horrors show the guys that they might want to stick to riding on two wheels…

…

Jim, aka The Mighty Quim: Hey, do you do Roller Derby?

Sonic Roller Skater: I don’t really do Roller Derby. Have you ever done it?

Jim, aka The Mighty Quim: No, but I will.

Sonic Roller Skater: Will you? It’s hard stuff.

…

Jim, aka The Mighty Quim: It’s up in Kingston, The Hudson Valley Horrors.

Steve, aka The Sleeve: Let me make sure the workman’s comp insurance is up to par before you go do that.

Jim, aka The Mighty Quim: When we were at Sonic and saw the waitress come out on roller skates, it kind spurt an idea about roller derby against one of the local team here.

Jason Pohl, aka Whirl Pohl: Are you serious?

Jim, aka The Mighty Quim: Yeah! You’d do it right?

Christian, aka The Shocker: I’d do it, yeah! I’d love to get my ass kicked by a bunch of girls.

…

Jim, aka The Mighty Quim: Alright, so what we’re gonna do is a little roller derby.

Paul Sr, aka The Stache: What are these girls, are they like professionals?

Jim, aka The Mighty Quim: They are professional roller derby.

Paul Sr, aka The Stache: Ever since we went to Sonic, Jim got this roller derby thing in his head and he not letting up, so I guess we’re doing roller derby.

Jim, aka The Mighty Quim: Now, they’re asking for nicknames.

Christian, aka The Shocker: I want mine to be The Shocker. I do alot of wiring.

Paul Sr, aka The Stache: Give me a nickname.

Jason Pohl, aka Whirl Pohl:  Larry

Christian, aka The Shocker: Furry kitten.

Jim, aka The Mighty Quim: The Stache.

Evan, aka The Epidural: Call me The Epidural.

Jim, aka The Mighty Quim: The roller derby names that the girls have they’re all really tough and emote a feeling of terror in the opponent. Hopefully when we roll out there with these nicknames on our backs, the girls don’t take it as too much of a joke.

Jason Pohl, aka Whirl Pohl: I want to be Thumper the Humper

Jim, aka The Mighty Quim: How about me? The Mighty Quim. We’re gonna get some t-shirts made up and see what we can do on the court, or derby, or track or whatever you would call the roller derby floor.

Christian, aka The Shocker: I can tell you right now you’re getting your ass kicked.

Evan, aka The Epidural: I can guarantee you I’m getting my ass kicked.

Paul Sr, aka The Stache: Alright, I’m in.

Jason Pohl, aka Whirl Pohl: I can’t even skate.

Jim, aka The Mighty Quim: Yeah, we’ll push you around.

Evan, aka The Epidural: I already feel pain.

…

Horrors: Pack it up! Pack it up!

Evan, aka The Epidural: Oh God, we’re dead!

Paul Sr, aka The Stache: While the Sonic bike is finishing up paint and powder coat, Jim organized a little friendly competition between OCC and the local roller derby team.

Jim, aka The Mighty Quim: Why are there so many of them.

Evan, aka The Epidural: I think we’re in trouble boys.

Puffy Bangs: Welcome to our house, we are the Hudson Valley Horrors. You guys think you’re good on two wheels, wait until you see what we can do on eight. You look a little intimidated, you alright there.

Puffy Bangs: I am so pleased to introduce the derby world to The Epidural, Shocker come on up, The Sleeve, The Mighty Quim.

Evan, aka The Epidural: Jim comes up with some really weird ideas… roller derby in the middle of the day.

Christian, aka The Shocker: Thank you.

Evan, aka The Epidural: But they’re always fun so we’re just gonna go with it.

Puffy Bangs: Can I have The Stache come forward please. Anyone, anyone.

Christian, aka The Shocker: We’ve done some interesting things at OCC over the years but the roller derby is definitely at the top of the list.

Puffy Bangs: Let’s get our gear on. Horrors grab yourself an OCC buddy and help them out.

Evan, aka The Epidural: They’re ready for battle, I can tell that right off the bat. When they handed us the mouthguard, that’s when I was like, this is pretty serious and I’m probably gonna get hurt.

Puffy Bangs: Stache thinks these boys are ready for some derby action, what do you girls think?

Horrors: Cheering!

Puffy Bangs: Roller derby is not an easy sport, we take this seriously, we train really hard, we’re competitive.

RxyRamalotte: 3, 2, 1

OCC: Yelling from the pack…

Johnny: Basically the game works, you have one jammer and four blockers. The jammer is kind of like the running back of a football team and their job is to get their way through the pack and lap everybody else. All the blockers have to basically block all the other players and make a gap for you so you can skate through the other team and lap the other team. When you lap the other team, you score points.

OCC & Horrors: Lots of yelling from the pack and the bench.

Rxy Ramalotte: Jammer on, jammer on.

Evan, aka The Epidural: We were in the first round it was pretty terrible, we got our asses handed to us.

Rxy Ramalotte: No, do not chase her:

Christian, aka The Shocker: They’re really tough. We’re like a bunch of newborn dear trying to run on ice.

Rxy Ramalotte: Get up, up, up, up. Get back out there. Pick it up. Come on. Where are you panties. Give me all your panties.

Paul Sr, aka The Stache: I’ve done a lot of crazy things in my time, but I’m not gonna add roller derby to my list. I’m gonna sit back and watch a bunch of girls beat the crap out of my guys.

Rxy Ramalotte: Man up on the red team. Be sticky and annoying. You have the annoying down.

Johnny: By the time the first round was over, we were already losing by like 30 points. When the whistle blew, I just went for it.

Christian, aka The Shocker: Go Johnny go.

Rxy Ramalotte: Yes, yes, yes… use your blockers

Johnny: We pushed through and we actually got some points.

Evan, aka The Epidural: So Johnny finally started to score some points, we’re all pretty pumped up and motivated that we were going to be shut out by a bunch of girls.

Rxy Ramalotte: Alright guys this is our last jam. We’re down 73 points, score is 76 to 3 right now. We’re gonna score another 74 points.

OCC: 1, 2, 3. OCC 911!!

Christian, aka The Shocker: I’m going in, I got a plan. When the whistle blew, I just went as fast as I can, full throttle, I think I was using illegal moves.

Evan, aka The Epidural: He didn’t care who was in his way, he was getting through them.

Christian, aka The Shocker: It’s definitely weird pushing girls around, but that’s what roller derby is about. We had to do what we had to do to score some points. They were really cool with us, I don’t think they took it easy on us, I can tell you that. I just want to thank the Hudson Valley Horrors for having us here and beating our asses a little bit. That was awesome, we should do it again some time, maybe come to our shop and kick your asses at something we’re good at.

Join the Frightmares for their first ever Spaghetti Dinner at Locust Grove! $10 for dinner, $9 with a non-perishable food item to be donated to the Hudson Valley Food Bank. Come support the junior league and a local charity all at once. Start off the season of giving the right way.

Here is what Frightmare Gillian has to say about the Spaghetti Dinner:
Helping other people is great! You gain an appreciation for everything you have and how good your life is.  Giving back to the community is also important because there are so many things that others in this community do for us. It is really great to help make the world a better place for other people.  There are so many people out there that could use a little help from more fortunate people, and what better way to serve others by helping them? So let’s go make some pasta and help people!!!!!

Spaghetti Dinner Event Details

Location: The Locust Grove 2683 South Road Poughkeepsie
Time: 6pm – 9pm
Date: November 8th
Price: $10 for dinner, $9 with non-perishable food item

What do you believe is the biggest misconception about derby?

One of the biggest misconceptions i have hear is, “oh that’s where you punch people” or “throw each other over railings”

How do people react when they find out you play roller derby?

People’s general reaction when they find out i play roller derby is , no way your too small, you look like a cheerleader.

Have you played in any other sports besides roller derby?

I played soccer growing up from 5-15 and then i tried cheerleading for a season, i played lacrosse my junior year of high school, and wrestled on the all boys league my senior year. After high school i didn’t play any sports for a year until i started roller derby.

What is your definition of team?

My definition of team is one cohesive unit that moves together and protects each other on the track. There is NO I in team, the quicker you learn that the more of an effective part of the team you become.

If you could change any rule what would it be and why?

No penalties… kidding!!! But it would probably be the rule that the opposing jammer can skate backwards to the front of the pack after hitting the other jammer, forcing the other jammer to get sucked back in by the opposing team, before making their initial pass!!

How has derby affected your life positively or negatively?

Derby has affected my life positively by giving me an outlet, for anger and aggression. It has allowed me to be empowered by all the other powerful ladies on the track. It has helped mold me into a more responsible person, (ex. attending functions and practices) as well as to mature and work with others effectively. i don’t think roller derby has impacted me negatively it really helps me focus my aggression in a positive manner. as well as meet all my lovely team mates.

What advice would you give to future horrors or frightmares?

Advice i would give future horrors or fright mares, keep it moving, challenge yourself every practice, aspire to improve and believe that you can. If you don’t get a certain skill or drill practice it, we aren’t all perfect at everything that’s what we practice is for. Believe you can do it and you will!! Most importantly, don’t over THINK!!! Your body will get the hang of the weird new positions!!! try out and prove to yourself how awesome you really are!!! Be your own “cheerleader”!!

How did you create your derby name?

I created my derby name by going through my playlist and listening to the band woe is me.

How did you hear about roller derby?

I never heard about roller derby until I saw a movie in block buster called Whip It, and later on my Uncle knew a roller derby girl and.went to a game and I saw the Frightmares and wanted to join.

What has been your most memorable moment?

My most memorable moment was when the Frightmares went down to Brooklyn and played against the Gotham girls with only 6 players.

How do people react when they find out you play roller derby?

Peoples reactions when they found out I play roller derby are surprised and amazed, most of the time i have to explain to them what roller derby is.

What is your goal in roller derby?

My goal in roller derby is to make it on the Hudson Valley Horrors.

Who gives you the most support to be the best player possible?

My mom and coaches Hitz and Tera, give me the most support to be the best player possible.

How do you plan to stay active during the off season?

I plan on going to the gym and doing out door skating to stay active during off season.

What is your favorite position to play?

My favorite position to play is blocker, you get so much adrenaline and anger it makes the game more fun for me.

What has been your biggest challenge while playing roller derby?

I think the biggest challenge of the game is having to play offense and defense at the same time.  There is no other sport where you have to do that.  It means having to be hyper aware of what is going on around you and being able to switch your mindset from kill, kill to help, help – lol.

How did you think of your name “Pinky Swears”?

That was one of the names that a former Horror, Scarlet Bloodletter was tossing around for her own name. I heard it and said, oh that is perfect for me because I turn bright pink when I laugh or skate or do anything, I can keep a secret (I have a few that will go to the grave with me) and I have a bit of a potty mouth.

What keeps you motivated to play your hardest?

My teammates… I never want to feel like I am letting them down.

On the track you have played every position. Which position is your favorite and why?

That’s a tough one because you learn from all of them.  You learn to be a better blocker when you jam and vice versa.  I believe that what is important is understanding your role when you hit the track, no matter what your position is.

How did you get involved in roller derby?

I was telling a co-worker that I called one of the rinks in the area to see if they had roller derby or would be willing to host a league.  She told me she had a friend that was starting a league. I was super psyched and asked her to find out the information for their first practice date .  I showed up, met Rxy Ramalotte and Rough Gem and I never looked back 🙂

What is the last movie you watched?

I don’t get to watch movies all that often anymore, I get too sucked in to shows like Dexter, Walking Dead, Breaking Bad, Downton Abbey and Glee.

The Horrors play on a flat track. Have you ever skated on a banked track? If yes, which track do you like better and why?

I have not, but it is on the bucket list.

What advice do you have for the Frightmares, who inspire to be just like the Horrors?

Skate hard and skate often but find other activities you like to do too, whether it’s soccer, dancing, snowboarding, etc.  This is a tough sport and cross-training is super important.

What made you decide to join roller derby?

A friend of mine was a part of the junior league and it always sounded really intriguing to me. I watched Whip It and I was hooked. I came to practice with her and I’ve been here ever since.

How did you feel at your first scrimmage?

I was really nervous. We had never been able to scrimmage among ourselves at practice because we did not have enough players. Once we got on the track, it was smooth sailing. It’s all about thinking on your feet.

What is your favorite position to play?

My favorite position to play is pivot.

How do people react when they hear you play roller derby?

Their facial reactions are usually the most interesting. They are generally taken aback, and I pride myself in that. Its a good feeling to have people excited to hear about what you do for fun.

Do you play any other sports?

No. I take dance classes and running is a hobby of mine.

What is your goal for this season?

This season I really want to work on mastering my turn around toe stops at high speeds.

How do you explain derby to someone who has never seen a bout?

I explain that there are five people from each team on the track. There is a captain of the track called a pivot and the person who scores points is called the jammer. Both wear panties on their head and panties are a helmet covering. The jammer has a star and the pivot has a stripe. Your team scores points when the jammer passes the hips of the players on the opposing team legally. And no, there is NO PUNCHING and generally no bleeding.

How did you feel when you were chosen to be captain of the first scrimmage?

It was an exhilarating feeling. I was honored to be trustworthy enough to represent teammates on and off of the track.